My Life as Abraham Lincoln

I was born in 1934 and am now 82 years old. My wife of 61 years, Patricia Ann Custer, was born in 1936 and is now 80. We took wedding vows seriously: until death us do part: And we have 5 adult children from 60 all the way down to early 40s. I have always been a unique kind of quitter. If I achieve the best I tried for, then I quit and move on to try something else.

 

Sight Seeing in Florida

Women’s Boxer Shorts

I really think ladies should be required to wear boxer shorts just like those that men wear. Why? Well, I remember a couple of years ago when we flew to Florida for my son’s Grand Opening for his new studio in West Palm Beach, Florida, that I saw a hairy frog.

We stayed in a luxury hotel in the city where my son lives, and lots of big spenders, like me and oldladylincoln, stay there. You can tell who we are as we don’t spend money at the local restaurants, because we eat the breakfast put-out by the hotel each morning. Yummy!

We were waiting for our son to come and pick us up in his Hummer (forgot the name of his vehicle that looks like something used in Iraq but it has a nicer paint job) — I saw this older gentleman sitting there in the lobby wearing beautiful white shorts. He was real tan like a Hershey Kiss.

Well, it was a clear mistake to notice him because he crossed his legs — his legs, up high, were snow white — Cool Whip white: The legs of his starched white shorts gaped open, and as God is my judge I saw a big old hairy frog staring at me from a briar patch — well, it looked like a frog in a briar patch!

I stood up because the sight gagged me. My wife asked if I was OK — I told her I swallowed spit; but I didn’t tell my wife about the frog — I asked her to come outside and we walked out without ever looking back. She never saw the frog — I hope she didn’t.

NOTE: That’s why I would like for ladies to wear shorts like men “should” wear. Understand, I don’t expect to see a lady’s frog, but I wouldn’t want to see a toad either.

Freezing Weather

It is “0” degrees this morning at 6:00 a.m. That is so cold I told, Pepper Jax to pee quick or it might freeze and stick him to the snow. He did and I didn’t have to go outside and rescue him. He is a great dog and if you love dogs or cats, you should visit your nearest animal shelter on days like this and rescue your best lifetime friend.

The cold cement floor and raised bed where he was caged was a shelter for him but he has been transformed from a life behind bars feeling like a lion in a cage to the price of the pride—loved by the girls and made over by all our visitors. True, he sheds and he barks a lot but the white hair is a pain for a short period of time and the barking stops after he gets to know you.

Frankly, I would love to have a Schnauzer (like Sophia who is Sonny and Eva’s little pooch) or a similar dog who doesn’t shed or bark at everything, but he is a Jack Russell Terrier and he was in the shelter that day and I just happened to have $70.00 in my wallet; and they said he cost that much but the price included his Darke County Dog License. He was moving to Montgomery County right away but we didn’t get him a new license for our county until the ones for Darke County ran out.

He is in “his recliner rocker” in my office in this photograph. It is the softest chair in the house and the only chair that reclines of rocks in my office and he owns it.

Blue Laws

© By Abraham Lincoln

When I was growing up the first day of the week, Sunday, was going to church day. Some of my friends went to church every Sunday. Most were like me and didn’t go to church. I don’t know if that was because we were poor and didn’t have clothes for church, or if there were other reasons. But mostly, the "Blue Laws" meant everything was closed on Sundays and you might as well go to church or stay at home.

It was impossible to go to a grocery store, a drug store, a movie theater, or to go anywhere on Sunday because everything was closed.

You could still find gasoline stations open on the big highways, like US Route 40. Lots of people ended up at these gasoline stations but not to buy gas. The stations often sold candy, ice cream, snacks, milk, bread and pop to travelers. The locals discovered if they ran out of bread they could go to the nearest gas station on "40" and buy some.

In those days, the "Blue Laws" were enforced. Blue laws were based on the biblical injunction against working on the Sabbath, and could be traced back to fourth-century Rome, when Constantine I, the first Christian emperor, commanded all citizens, except farmers, to rest on Sunday.

The first blue law in America was enacted in the Virginia colony in the early 1600s and required church attendance. Fortunately, the laws where I lived did not "require" church attendance. Though I might have turned out better if they did.

About three-fourths of the states still have laws on their books imposing some kind of Sunday restriction on such activities as retail sales, general labor, liquor sales, boxing, hunting, or barbering, as well as polo, cockfighting, or clam digging. These laws have been challenged in federal courts as a violation of the Sherman Anti-trust Act and the First Amendment guarantee of freedom of religion.

The Supreme Court has upheld them, starting with McGowan v. Maryland (1961), ruling that though the laws originated for religious reasons, the state has a right to set aside a day of rest for the well-being of its citizens.

How about that? I think these laws also contributed to a steady birth rate. I mean winter is bad enough but when you can’t go anywhere it seemed like the only thing going up was the national birthrate.

Last Day in 2016

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I am in the process of growing a new beard. Nobody really said they liked it but some said they thought it made me look older? This is the last time you will see me in 2016. We are going to a surprise birthday party for my grandson later this morning. That should be quite an experience.

When you are already 82 and will be 83 on the next birthday, being older is hard for me to even imagine. I look a lot older than my brother-in-law who is just ten years younger than me. When I first met him, he was sitting on their sofa at home and I sat down and showed him how to draw Mickey Mouse. That turned his whole life around and instead of being a musician he turned out to be an artist.

2016 Going for Good

It snowed at midnight and again at 2:30 a.m. this morning but not much and none of it is on the ground. We don’t need any snow or ice but I am sure we are going to get some before this winter of 2016 Is over with. It turned out to be 30 degrees when I got up this morning at 5:00 am and took my first breathing treatment for the day.

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This is really a neat setup. I have had the monitor for a long time but stopped using it some years ago and began using larger monitors that Patty got for me. I got bored the other day and put the 27 inch monitor on the shelf in my closet in the office and got this one out.  I like this it because you can see the whole page without scrolling.

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My beard is still growing all over my face. I have no idea when it will be a good time to think about shaving again. Patty would have me do it today or yesterday because she doesn’t like it. I like beards because I don’t have to shave. I just remembered that I never saw a soldier with a beard. I looked at my photos of soldiers in my company over seas and none of them wore a beard. Maybe it was not allowed—I have forgotten lots of things like that.

I began this life 82 plus years ago. I was born in the old cast iron bed in the living room of our old house on Railroad Street in Gordon, Ohio. The years 1934 and 1936 were hot ones so Patty, my wife of 61 years, was hot too. She was tiny and her folks and grandparents put her in a shoe box and set it on the oven door of the kitchen cook stove to keep her warm.

My folks never put me in a shoe box because I was a 10 pound and 8 ounce boy. Big for the times and not much was expected from me. Mom gave birth to me without the assistance of Dr. Van Pelt, Gordon’s local doctor. He promised to walk across the railroad tracks to our house when the time came but he never showed up so the local midwife, Emma Schoenfelt, did whatever they do with hot water until I popped out on the bed. I can’t even imagine a mother doing that these days.

I played outside almost all the time until mom called me inside to eat a bite of lunch. Lunch in those days was always leftovers from the previous couple of meals that hadn’t spoiled yet. Whatever was left after we ate was given to Betty, my white dog, and what she didn’t eat went over the fence around the chicken pen.

Nobody bothered to remember days, weeks, months or years. The only thing that most remembered was the last time somebody was put in jail or when some of the local boys were sent across the pond, in uniform, to find a war against people we didn’t know.

My Monitor Pivots

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This is an older monitor that HP used to make. I have always liked it and kept it on a shelf in my office. I had been using a huge 27 inch flat screen monitor that Patty bought me and it was fine but one day I put that new one on the shelf and got this old one down and hooked it up.  Hewlett-Packard has the drivers to update the software and in ten minutes I had it working just fine. And I really like it a lot.

I can use the Dell Keyboard with it, as shown, but I am using an i-rocks keyboard as it has two additional slots to hook up USB drives. The black Dell keyboard doesn’t have anything extra on it. I have at least 6 keyboards in the garage on the shelf. The lettering comes off on the Mac keyboards, after daily use, so I put mine away and am using the little keyboard with two batteries inside that came with one of the Mac computers we bought. I like it and it works fine and is hooked up to my iMac.